Relationship breakdown is hard for everyone involved. There are finances to sort, arrangements to be made for separating your lives and there might be the needs of children to be considered. All of this on top of the emotional turmoil of losing that person in your life that you thought would always be there for you, there's no wonder some people find it too much to cope with. Some positives can come from a failed relationship, though, and we promise that in a couple of years, you will appreciate the experience. Here are some lessons that you can learn as you go through your breakup.
You learn to be more expressive
As you untangle your lives together, you and your ex-partner are going to have to spend a lot of time figuring out what both of you need to move on. Whether it's financial, practical issues such as what needs to happen for the children, or emotional in helping each other to figure out what went wrong, you will need to find a way to communicate your feelings to move on. This lesson will help you so much in other areas of life and especially when you are ready to start a new relationship.
You become a better communicator
When you are going through a relationship breakdown, it's not just your ex-partner that you are going to have to deal with. You might be dealing with professional entities such as solicitors, estate agents, landlords or staff at the bank. You might also have to find ways to communicate what is happening to your children or to friends and family. It might be difficult at the moment, but it will help you build up communication skills that you never thought possible. Take a look at the Family section of our website, we're bound to have some tips to help you talk to your children about what is happening.
You discover the emotional side of yourself.
A break-up really forces you to consider your emotions. It brings all those feelings that you had maybe forced down to the surface and makes you deal with them. According to Sydney marriage counselling experts, the best way to work through emotions is to talk them through. Spend some time with your ex-partner and a counsellor, if you can, to ensure you can both understand your feelings, it will help you become more emotionally intelligent in the long run.
You learn the value of giving and taking.
A break-up really is a negotiation process. Many couples going through the separation process fall into the trap of trying to take as much as they possibly can at the end of the relationship, without thought for their ex-partner and their needs. Remember, you did love this person once, so try and come to an arrangement that works for you both. It will need some give and take, but really that is true throughout life.
You learn to be patient and calm.
Breaking up is hard, and it is going to require your patience both with your ex-partner and with other people, whether they are professionals or close family or friends. Just remember, it will all be worth it in the end and that you will develop a new set of skills to help you deal with difficult situations more effectively in the future.
