7 Things I've learnt about African dating

Have you ever imagined yourself dating African girls? However, in my circle of friends, I have become the go-to person to raise regarding which websites have more confusing lingo. I also can be relied on for a bloodcurdling story or two.

I actually have left myself to reach the grave single. As there's no hope for my romantic endeavors, I'll share some of the items I learned before I quietly walked into perpetual singlehood.

1) Online dating is the way forward

I'm a reasonably recent convert to OkCupid and Tinder. Before that, I wanted to take my possibilities of meeting men in the real world. This led to being accosted within the tomato aisle at Fruit & Veg by an awfully persistent man who demanded my BBM pin and proceeded to text sort of an adolescent, then asked if I'd be pleased with Spur for our 1st date.

At that time, I decided: if the internet was OK for finding cheap long-haul tickets, it had been OK for trying to find the next person I needed to look at Game of Thrones cuddled up next to. So far, it's been 90th roaring, and I am happy to share that I actually have not met any serial killers; that was my biggest concern entering.

2) Ladies paying for 1st dates is never OK

Given that there's still a gender pay gap between men and women, the person who made you allow your house should ne'er expect the gorgeous one to succeed in her wallet. If you think about how much Mackintosh lipstick costs, to not mention cute shoes, tasteful accessories, and Uber, then technically, the girl is out of pocket before the first morsel arrives.

3) Netflix and chill are only some of the first-date possibilities. Discuss this with your cheap friends because I do not like this nonsense. Firstly, the real danger of Africans dating men suggests that going to a stranger's house to satisfy them could be a terrible idea. Secondly, why set the bar this low? Some months later, after you wish to attend the art show, most are noisy, and your wife prefers to remain on the couch and binge-watch series instead ...

4) Men who don't smile in their online dating profile photos cannot be trustworthy

Think about it. Why are they not even attempting to appear friendly? However, will we grasp they need teeth if they do not show them? Who told them that mugshot-looking photos are appealing? A strict no to all or any of this.

5) don't ever provide your number to guys who ask if you've got WhatsApp

Do you know that moment in horror movies once the gorgeous, oblivious star is warned about the danger they're gaily skipping towards? Image me as that lawman of a poky city, trying to avoid wasting you from impending doom.

Nothing, I repeat, nothing sensible ever comes from giving alien access to your inbox. At best, it'll cause boring conversations that discontinue and exploit you without satisfying the person in the real world. At the worst, you may get uninvited pictures of some man's nether regions. Your knowledge and eyeballs merit higher.

6) There's no limit to the questions you'll need to answer

The fastest way to elicit a barrage of items is to let the world grasp that you're trying to find love in a trendy manner. Relations wish to understand why you cannot meet somebody good at a work/church/stokvel meeting. Work colleagues are interested in the individuals you meet online. The people you date wish to understand why you're not married. Such a lot of queries, thus few boundaries.

7) Your married friends can wish to set you up

One facet effect of matrimony is the urge by the happy man and wife to play matchmaker for his or her single friends. Dinner invites involve the sole 2 single people attending being strategically seated about one another. One of the superpowers I've developed is reading between the lines of couples' invitations to understand if there's a possible set-up enclosed within the casual invite to cheese and wine.