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The ref is out of the ring . . . .


Three months after S’fiso Ncwane’s death, his mum and widow aren’t talking – and they have booked separate mourning ceremonies for today.

Umakoti is S’fiso Ncwane’s widow, Ayanda Ncwane. Her Mamazala is the late Sfiso’s mum, Fikile Ncwane.

Today, Ayanda will go ahead with the cleansing ceremony for her husband.

Her in-laws claim she never told them. And family sources alleged that today is also the day for Ayanda’s in-laws to host a memorial ceremony for S’fiso.

One source alleged that Ayanda wasn’t invited. Another family friend claimed Ayanda felt her mourning period was over.

“Ayanda feels she’s ready to carry on with her life. She didn’t invite S’fiso’s family as she felt her own family’s support was enough,” the source alleged.

S’fiso’s mum Fikile said she didn’t know about Ayanda’s ceremony.

“I wasn’t told or invited. I guess she doesn’t need us there. But our tradition dictates that a wife should wear her mourning clothes for a year.

“If Ayanda decided to cut her mourning period short, there’s nothing we can do.”

Fikile also said her side of the family would hold a cleansing ceremony on or after 11 March.

“Only then will I take off my mourning clothes,” said Fikile.

S’fiso’s sister, Gugu, confirmed that Ayanda’s ceremony clashes with Fikile’s today.

“We’re also doing a small ceremony in his remembrance as well today on Sunday. We didn’t invite her because she doesn’t take our calls,” said Gugu.

Spokesperson for Ncwane Communications, Thobile Mchunu, confirmed Ayanda’s cleansing ceremony.

“S’fiso died on 5 December so, this date has a special meaning to us. It’s been three months since his death. Today will be an intimate affair for Ayanda, the family and S’fiso’s friends,” said Thobile.

She said Ayanda’s mourning wasn’t about culture but she was merely respecting her husband.

“Ayanda decided by herself how she’d mourn her husband. Now she’s decided to do the cleansing ceremony todayon Sunday and take off her mourning clothes. After this, she can carry on with her life and also be able to attend to the media and the general public,” said Thobile.

Thobile added that she didn’t know S’fiso’s mum wasn’t invited.

She said: “I didn’t know they’re also having a ceremony on the same date.”

South African Traditional Healers Association President, Sazi Mhlongo, said tradition dictates that Sfiso’s family should perform the ceremony for Ayanda.

“If she does it on her own, she invites bad luck and will need to slaughter a goat to apologise,” said Mhlongo.