At first glance it looks like innocent fun between consenting adults, but a closer look reveals there’s more to this trend. Social media is abuzz with stories shared by young women engaging in a new type of exchange – s_ex for goods. Many people are wondering whether this is not just plain exploitation for economic emancipation.


A Tshwane mum has labelled her 22-year-old daughter’s 54-year-old Blesser a curse in her daughter’s life. She’s gone as far as kicking her daughter out of the house and asking the Blesser to leave her daughter alone. The response was reportedly that he would “release her”. The Blessee is said to have been neglecting her studies by opting to spend time with her Blesser, rather than attending classes. It’s hard to prove the value of education and hard work when young people see so many struggling graduates and there seems to be all these “shortcuts” to the good life.


How can we prove the value of being economically capacitated and active in your own right, when the lifestyle provided by the sugar daddy seems so glamorous? The allure of instant gratification remains ever enchanting. Why study when Blesser-Bae can sponsor a lifestyle far better than what could be afforded on an entry-level salary or the pittance that many entrepreneurs profit in the first year or two of trading? It seems the struggle for economic emancipation is a little too real. But aside from the fact that a Blesser-Blessee relationship could involve minors, is there really anything wrong with it? If both parties are happy, why is this still such a controversial topic? The answer is in the question. Are both parties happy? If a man must buy a woman’s attention or affection and if a woman sells her attention or affection, is that happiness? We’re talking about a “willing buyer, willing seller” arrangement.

Yet the Blessee is essentially a commodity, which questions their agency in this relationship. In principle, there’s nothing wrong with free individuals engaging in a voluntary relationship with one another. But what happens when a new, more desired Blessee comes along? One with a more desired price tag? Will the old Blessee be chucked to the sidelines? If it’s all just about bang for buck, this relationship establishes a hierarchy of power where women’s bodies are commodified and the sugar daddy ends up holding all the cards.

And what if the Blesser runs out of means by which to bless? Would the Blessee find another, richer Blesser? Finally, what about the social good that comes from a society in which men and women are economically capable? Women have been working long and hard at gaining equality on all fronts. It would be a shame to quit now.

Source : Daily Sun