Moving in with your significant other is a big step that can mean making significant strides in your relationship. While sharing a space with your partner might seem exciting, you don't want to move too fast and get in over your head. All couples, whether straight, gay, or lesbian dating, experience anxiety about moving in with a partner.

Too many couples move in too soon because they feel it's the "right" thing to do based on where they are in their relationship. While there can be a lot of pressure to move quickly, you need to make sure you and your significant other are on the same page before packing your bags. Here are some questions to ask before you move in with your partner.

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What's your motivation for cohabitating?

First, you need to ask yourself why you want to move in together in the first place. While it's perfectly alright to consider saving money as one of the reasons to share a single rent payment, it probably shouldn't be your only motivation. Similarly, you don't want to move simply because you feel it's the next natural step in your relationship.

Think about all the hassle it is to move. You must find a place, sign a lease, pay a deposit, sell half of your things, pack all your belongings, and get started in a new home. This isn't a simple process, so it's not one you should enter lightly. Why do you want to spend your home life with your partner? Do you love spending time with them? Are you ready for more commitment? These are solid foundations to build a life on.
How will you cover your finances?

One of the most common reasons couples break up is the splitting of finances. It's easy to think that "won't happen to you," but you won't know until you're in that situation yourself. Having the "money talk" is never fun but necessary. How will you split your rent and utilities? Who will manage the bills and household finances? What happens in the case of a breakup?


Tackling your finances before you sign a lease together is an excellent way to prevent problems. Be incredibly honest with your partner about how much you can afford to spend on rent, utilities, and groceries. Make sure you're both on the same page. From there, decide how much each person will pay. It's okay to not decide on a 50/50 split, especially if one partner is still in school or has a higher-paying job. The reality, however, is that both couple members need to agree.


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How will you address any problems?

No matter how well you get along with your partner, sharing a small space is different. Even the most compatible people will struggle occasionally when they spend most of their time together. When you're living with someone else, you don't have a place to escape to be alone. This can exacerbate even the most minor problems.

That's why you need to have a plan for addressing problems. Talk to your partner about how they deal with conflict. What will you do if the other partner gets angry? Can you both agree to give each additional personal space within your shared home when needed? Having a plan of action for when things go wrong will help you both avoid nights spent on the couch.

How will you divide housework?

Are you prepared to live with your partner's habits? Even if your partner is a charming, happy person every day, you might not realize that they also like throwing all their dirty clothes on the floor and never doing the dishes. These are essential things to think about before you sign a lease.

Talk about housework and how you feel about chores. Create a chore chart to clarify who will be responsible for what within your home. You might not divide your housework equally depending on work hours, who pays for what, and personal preference, but you both must agree.

Prepare for this big step.

Moving in together is a significant change. You should not take it lightly, but it shouldn't wholly intimidate you either. Ask the questions above if you feel confident you're ready to live full-time with your partner. The worst thing you can do is rush into a lease agreement only to discover you hate living with your partner. You're ready to make this move as long as you're honest with yourself about your relationship and expectations.